A Musical Tribute to Ornery Moe

I love my friend, Jude. She consistently wins the award for friend whose life I would most like to have. In her copious free time between writing for the New York Times Circuits section, writing books for Mac geeks, taunting the fashion poodles [™ Jude] at the Times Magazine, living in connubial bliss with the lovely Betsy, and pursuing her never-ending goal to get the word "booger" printed in the Gray Lady, she took a moment to pen this ode to Ornery Moe for me.

(To be sung to the tune of "Modern Major General")

ORNERY MOE

I am the very model of a late-night bookstore sorting cart
I wait all day to stock the shelves the customers have torn apart
I like to be well organized before I have to start my rounds
So with my racks you know you really, really shouldn't fuck around
History and religion go above the books for geeks and nerds
And my bottom shelf's for books stomped by the nasty little rugrat herd

BIG BOOKSTORE EMPLOYEE CHORUS:
The bottom shelf's for books stomped by the nasty little rugrat herd!
The bottom shelf's for books stomped by the nasty little rugrat herd!
The bottom shelf's for books stomped by the nasty little rugrat herd!

ORNERY MOE:
So at the Info Desk I sit and gather orphan books all day
And await the evening hour when I roll out to put this shit away
So wheel me 'round whenever all the bookshelves have been torn apart
I am the very model of a late-night bookstore sorting cart!